Carol’s Column

Forget alien plants, what about guns?

There is nothing that unites a country as much as a fearsome enemy. Right now, there's a danger that South Africa, floundering in the complacency of democracy, is in danger of losing its cutting edge.

So, to the nation's rescue comes a fierce and dreaded common enemy. Aliens.

Throughout the country a rallying call is being sounded. Aliens must be exterminated. Kill cannas. Pines must perish. And so on.

Alien vegetation must go. In the Cape fires are started by alien vegetation. In the Eastern Cape the endangered rocky fish (just recently rediscovered) is threatened by alien vegetation, while in Gauteng alien trees bring disease in the form of conifer sickness.

It's an interesting thing how everyone has climbed onto the alien vegetation bandwagon.

For hundreds of years, South Africans have enjoyed the shade of oaks, the brilliant colour of bougainvillaea and hibiscus. They've sniffed fragrant roses and planted marigolds to keep away snails, while conifers have acted as fire breaks, forest plantations and shade trees.

Yet, all of a sudden, alien vegetation is being blamed for every misfortune.

While there's been flooding in the northern parts of the country, the Cape has been devastated by fires.

Unusually hot conditions, no rain and wind have contributed to the bush fires which recently went on the rampage.

"But," say the experts, "it's alien vegetation which is to blame."

It seems that the fires would not have burned had there not been alien trees and bushes everywhere.

So, with much enthusiasm, the Cape countryside is being ethnically cleansed.

For the past week, the slopes of Table Mountain have had parties of exotic exterminators pulling out anything regarded as "alien". Every tree, plant or shrub that originated overseas - in Mexico, South America, Asia, England – wherever.

Birds and creatures, not naturally xenophobic in nature, learn to adapt and, over the years, even species indigenous to this country have become accustomed to aliens in their habitat.

It's an interesting phenomenon. I mean, I would have thought drivers without licences or drivers who drink are far more of a menace to our habitat. But, relatively speaking, they're left to cause the damage they do in large numbers.

Drive around Johannesburg and see how many times you have to brake because of a taxi which has suddenly and illegally stopped? How many times you swerve out of the way to avoid somebody who has cut in front of you? How many times your life is endangered by a thoughtless and incompetent twit of a driver?

A few are removed, but the majority remain free to perpetrate havoc.

While I'm not advocating that such menaces should be pulled off the road and destroyed (the fate of alien vegetation), they should be rooted out.

Personally, if I had to cleanse South Africa of anything, it wouldn't be alien vegetation, it would be guns.

Robberies, hijackings and murders and most deaths and injuries are caused by people carrying guns. Visit the casualty ward of Chris Hani Baragwanath Hospital on any night and you'll see that the majority of wounds are gun-related.

Instead of eliminating alien plants, perhaps we should be concentrating our energies on getting rid of guns.

I understand the importance of ensuring the balance of our ecosystem, but, as I watched the vigorous pulling out of alien plants on the slopes of Table Mountain, I couldn't help thinking our priorities are all screwed up.

Of course, trees, flowers and bushes don't have a voice. They can't answer back and they don't vote. So they're the perfect enemy. They can justifiably be destroyed.

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